A Note from a Former People Pleaser
“Am I now trying to win the approval of human beings, or of God? Or am I trying to please people? If I were still trying to please people, I would not be a servant of Christ.” Galatians 1:10
I was a people pleaser. It was hard for me to say no because when someone asked me to do something I felt included. I craved community.
In my quest I was saying yes to things I normally wouldn’t. They were a bit out of character and out of my comfort zone, but not in a good way. I wanted so badly to be seen as someone who was available and willing that I was becoming someone I was never meant to be.
By saying yes to the things I shouldn’t have I was saying no to the things God wanted me to.
I’m sure God was still using me in those situations. He has a way of doing that. But I was not allowing myself to be used to the full potential He had designed for me. Even though I thought I was doing good by engaging with others, I started to change on the inside to conform to the people around me.
Finally I had enough. It was exhausting to be constantly striving for acceptance by people who didn’t even know I was seeking their approval. Situations and relationships that I thought were so important were trivial to someone else. It was time to reset my focus on who I was trying to please.
Being a people pleaser means I cannot be a servant to God. Ouch. That’s my #1 purpose!!
With lots of no’s and and separation I was able to refocus my heart. Once I realized that the only one who I needed to please was God those things became much easier. Not only was I able to gain confidence in my choices, I was saying yes to all the right things.
It’s ok to not have the approval of the people around you as long as you are doing it prayerfully and faithfully through Christ. Chose His validation over others and find your worth in community with Him. It will never fail you.
(For further study, consider reading 1 Corinthians 4:3-5)